I am BACK ladies and gents and man how I have missed my blog. In the last 6 months or so a TON has happened and ill be sharing my views on a wide variety of issues in coming blogs. Disclaimer: I
live in America. Each day here is a new episode of foolery and fuckery so for bloggers like myself, it makes for a ton of juicy material. But HEY, one blog at a time. We will get to all recent foolishness later, but for now, let’s talk about
weddings!
So late last year I launched my blog Everyday Girl Spin & things went great! Better than great, actually
it was phenomenal. However, after the excitement of spreading news of my engagement
wore off, it was actually time to plan. So okay, maybe people were right. Launching a blog in the middle of wedding
planning and on top of Graduate school may not have
been the best idea. My time was limited L before I
knew it I was knee-deep in wedding planning and just like that, POOF… I disappeared,
abandoned my blog and embarked on an entirely different level of craziness. NOW
I am back (YAYYY, as I hit whatever hip dance the kids are doing this week lol)
and I am ready to dish! 
So weddings. What does that
make you think of? A beautiful dress? That shit is expensive. Memorable food,
yep that shit is far TOO expensive, great pictures and great drinks, be
prepared to fork out that money because unless you plan on sipping apple juice YEP that process is fucking
expensive too! I knew the process would be time-consuming but what I did
not know is how many freaking gray hairs I would accrue in the process. Though the outcome was ABSOLUTELY more astonishing
and visually stimulating than I EVER could have imagined (insert pat on the back J), the process of getting there,
yeahhhhhhh… nothing could have prepared me for all of that. If you are looking
for the process to be fun and if you are defining “fun” as amusing,
entertaining, or enjoyable, then yeah, “fun” may not be the exact word I choose
to describe it. The real
“fun” comes when you are boarding the plane to your Caribbean honeymoon taking silly Snapchat videos on the plane. Caterers, liquor licenses, dessert tables and
flaky RSVP’s are sure to drive you insane, but stage by stage, invitation by
invitation, phone call by phone call, I
sucked it up and got to work. When you start the wedding planning process, it is all cute and you find just about any reason for that perfect “bride-to-be” kind of selfie …. THEN, the date is set, the countdown begins, and similar to pregnancy, the last stretch is the craziest! Throughout this process, I have compiled a list of 10 things every reasonable non-bridezilla, the bride-to-be should know and be cool with moving into the grand finale. I do not want to exhaust my readers so for this blog I will share my first five! Be mindful, my experiences are totally my own. I cannot tell you what works for
YOU and your pockets but I can share some useful tips that I
wish someone would have tossed my way; anything I can do to help!
1.
Do
not strive for perfection instead strive for LOGICAL! Trust me I get it. As a girl that was
engaged for a year and a half, I have looked at more websites than I can
imagine, filled out more “get free shit” questioners that I wanted, scrolled
Pinterest more than any reasonable person should and forced me to watch
a cringe-worthy episode of “Four Weddings” on TLC. Note: ANYTHING on the TLC network during this planning stage will either make you entertain some fancy barn
transformation wedding or just simply drive you insane! There comes a time when you just need to ‘X’ out of Etsy,
log off amazon prime and set the grocery store magazines dowwwwwwwn. Their
weddings don’t have to be your wedding! Do what makes sense to YOUR own
budget. Keep in mind that all the glitz and glam is great, but it certainly
comes with a price tag attached. If you are hosting a wedding to please
everyone else, you are doomed…. Do
what feels right to you and your significant other without going into debt or
picking up another job to pay for it all. Remember it is YOUR wedding, there is
no handbook, and traditions can be broken. Find a way to enjoy it. Satisfy your
own needs- what everyone else wants really does
not matter. After all, it will all be a blur afterward but hey no one
ever tells you that part, right. J
2.
Realize
there will be things that just do not matter…. At least
to no one except the Bride, she is always the X factor. I racked my brain with
napkin colors, table décor, aisle runners, programs, menu, and table favors. All
the things that my husband just nodded at and agreed but really could care less about.
Not to generalize all men, but most people aside from the bride and maybe the mother of the bride cares very little about whether or not the flower petals line the aisle
runner correctly or whether or not the table linen is ivory or blue. In hindsight, it totally won't matter when it’s
over. Give people air conditioning, something to snack on, something to drink, and a good tune to dance to and all is good; everything else is extra!
3.
People
do not read invitations, do not save the ‘save the dates’, and could care less
about wedding websites. All of this I learned the hard way. Since my husband
and I have been together for SUCH a long time, 7 years to be exact (whoop
whoop), a traditional registry seemed unrealistic, a waste of our friend/family’s
money, and a quick way to flood our
homes with even more things we don’t need or won't use. Ungrateful? Never, but
back to that whole logically thing, yes this is the time where logic has to supersede
tradition. Sure it is fun to run through a store and scan a ton of shit to a registry,
but then what? When the wedding is over, will you look back at that $55.00
toaster from Bed Bath and Beyond and think, “Geez, this was the best”, probably not. Instead, since a
wedding is one of those rare times that it is socially acceptable to ask for things,
make it worth it. We opted for one of these new and super smart registries
called a honeymoon fund. There are a lot of online honeymoon registries and the
one I went with even allowed me to create a FREE wedding website.
I worked
hard, like super hard on our website. I downloaded snappy stories, uploaded old
pictures, and added a full play by play regarding all the wedding details, but
guess what, I STILL got the same questions over and over again. “When is the wedding?
Where is the wedding? Where are you registered? OMG, I wanted to yell "it is on the damn site
people, check the site!" UGH. I said all of that to say, the things that
mean the most to you for wedding
planning, likely means the least to anyone
else LOL. True, true, true. Instead, opt for what we know best, online!
Printing all these things are NOT cheap and postage? Do NOT get me started?
Instead, create an online community that people can check through social media
sites. Easier to manage, response times are in real-time, and more importantly,
if it is on social media, let’s be honest, most people are addicted to their
phones, so at least you know it likely won't be ignored! Consider your guest
populations and try to do things that are easy for you to create and them to navigate. Some of the honeymoon sites also allow electronically
RSVP’s as well. The site is a fun and easy way to get people to donate to different fun
events you and your spouse can enjoy on your honeymoon. You can transfer the
money directly to your account and though it takes a few days to hit, it is
worth it when it does. We used it in the Bahamas and MANNN did it come in
useful! MUCH more useful than a toaster LOL.
4.
Recognize
that people are flaky and RSVPs are asinine. I must not lie. Before planning my own
wedding, as awful as this sounds, I never RSVP’d for nearly anything. Let’s just
say that karma SUCKS and now I totally get its importance. Lesson learned. I
will always
RSVP going forward. It is borderline disrespectful not to. When planning a wedding what you pay literally
depends on the number of people. The HUGEST cost was by far the food
catering. For this reason, knowing
exactly how many people you need to feed is significant and extremely
important. As if wedding planning is not enough, the bride and groom do not
have time, nor should they have time to track down people. Not via text, not via
Facebook, nowhere. If you sent the save-the-dates and sent the formal invites,
your job is D-O-N-E. Here is a funny little fact: My husband and I invited 100
guest, 32 RSVP’d on the wedding site, yet 120 people showed up the day of. Can you imagine the frustration of having to
pay even MORE money because people just
woke up and decided to show to your wedding? See, headcount matters dude! Also,
keep in mind that just because people will tell you they are coming, they still
might not- that is where the flakiness comes in. Things come up, kids get sick,
people lie, and sometimes it is as simple as people change their minds. Don't take it personally. Sometimes free food and drinks are not enough.
It's fine, just roll with it J
5. Decide rather or not a wedding
a coordinator is even needed and make sure you have a plan for the entire extra’
everything that you are sure to have.
When I started this process, I laughed at
the idea of paying someone to make my vision come alive. I mean, as a person
that has planned more events than I can count, why in the world would I pay someone to do it, right? NO. WRONG,
DEAD WRONG. This type of planning is not, I repeat NOT for everyone. If you have a hard time
staying organized, feel uneasy negotiating things, or have very little time to
research… do yourself a favor and get a Wedding Planner, you will need it. HOWEVER,
if not, suck it up, grind it out, and do it yourself! It takes A LOT
of time and it puts you under tremendous pressure, but if you handle pressure well and have reliable (keyword being reliable) people in your corner, Try it! I worked on my table décor until 10 minutes before my makeup was scheduled
to be completed and was still getting balloons blown up while my bridesmaid
arrived… delegate, trust you won't regret it! In doing so you will likely sacrifice the easy-breezy, ‘pamper
me’ moments at the beginning of the day, but hear me when I say, there is NO better feeling
than looking around and knowing that you slayed that shit without a coordinator.
Sometimes self-accomplished is the best prize. It is quite the ego boost for
the big day, I highly recommend! Not only did I save money not hiring a
coordinator but more importantly, I maintained a level of sanity throughout all
this without relaying what I wanted to a third party J Time flies on the big day so don’t be afraid to
lean on your helpers to get things moving along. It’s your wedding, make time to
enjoy it!
I will leave you with this: if something goes wrong, OH WELL! No one will know but YOU. On the big day, if things don't go exactly as planned, it is fine, you won't be any less married! Lean on friends, remember to laugh about the silly things, have a flask hidden at your table lol and reap the benefits of your hard work. Overall when its all said and done, the wedding will be one big
freakin’ blur anyways. Don’t overthink it, don’t
underestimate it, and don’t think the impossible can’t happen because it can. Just
focus on the memories and the moments and then do like me and write blogs to
help other brides. Hey, it takes a village, right? Hang in their sisters, it
will all be good in the end… and if not, oh well you still married the love of
your life, you are still out a shit ton of money, and Facebook memories will forever remind
us about this special time forever. It all works out in the end.
... Until Next Time Guys
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